the girl next to me goes back and fourth, back and fourth, between sounding eerily like a girl who has had a huge fight with her friend sitting diagonally from her in a triangle of three, where anger and manipulation are the key tones, and then turns into a sweet, advice giving person, laughing with her best friend. It doesn't help that she, appearing the strongest personality or the entirely dominant of the three, is talking in 40 percent english, and 60 percent something I dont understand, so its not spanish or english. The other two are much better at dividing their conversations, they finish each sentence at least in one language before switching to the other. They are literally practically on top of me, as I am in a corner in a soft leather lounger, part of a set of four, two facing the other two, and they took one and turned it to make a triangle. Here is a diagram for your reference, excuse my windows paint skills.
So don't take any of this negatively, I dont mind these women, or anyone else here for that matter. As you may well know I find human behavior, especially in public places fascinating. In a way I love these women for inspiring this blog post as a stream of my surroundings.
On the contrary completely, the table far in front of (above) me are two beautiful women, I am assuming students because of the work that they are doing, being very polite and quiet with their laptops lightly chatting and one was even skyping, but quiet to the point that I couldn't hear what she was saying. They are both wearing hjabs, another grouping of culture I know nothing about.
In the everyone else category, are a few randoms and the small little no space for anything tables they put stupidly in coffee shops, not really saving any space no matter what kind of three chair set up they use around it. But mostly their are moms, or that's what I have assumed from their nature, their look, their walks, what they were all doing here at once. at least a dozen of them all walked in the door at once, and spent over ten minutes trying to reconfigure half the shop so they could all sit with each other and not leave anyone out. they are actually on their way out now, and the noise level has reduced by half, and the shop is inching closer to the emptiness I found when I first got here. I guess 7pm is a busy time for coffee, but 6:40 was dead. I got a night way different than expected hear.but this is what happens at the local starbucks. Changes by the second, as is life. Peace.
PS: When i come to starbucks at night I order Caramel Apple Spice, not coffee. :P
Oh hi there? been a while hasn't it. yeah well life's got me busy. working full time kicks my butt some times. I feel like i used to do so much more, I was in school full time, and usually working 20-30 hours a week, plus about another 10-15 hours of community and organizational work. lets just say four years f college, burnt me out just as much as it changed and inspired me. I feel like soon I will get to a point where I catch a balance and enjoy parts of life. Money's tight however, doing a job that I love, so once I also balance my finances, I will feel more comfortable going out and having a little fun. don't get me wrong, I still see friends (does two count?) but we just hang out or get coffee, or hanging out revolves around driving one said person to work when she oversleeps. but then we always blast the music, fight about how shes putting to much makeup on, and end with a "get out, your going to make me late for work, love you bye". Life is treating me exceptionally well for the most part. My grandparents have graciously let me stay with them, and when I am actually home before 10 at night, feed me amazing, home-cooked Jewish food that I remember from my childhood. believe me I'm watching myself before I gain 10 pounds. However they keep kosher, and I spend so many meals at work that I usually by about half my own groceries for lunches and dinners and keep and eat them there.And that way I can have cheese on my turkey sandwich.
My trusty handy best and worst rustbucket that ever happened to me, my nissan truck, finally went kuput this summer, (I may have mentioned this), forcing me to take on a car payment. An unexpected but welcome and gratefully amazing change. My air works. My heat works. It doesnt go clunk. I am lucky if i have to fill the tank once a week. All compliments here. The newness to me still hasnt worn yet. Its useful, and oh so fun.
Mentioning fun, I hope you all will be having a fantastical week celebrating Halloween. Its one of my favorite holidays. I know a lot of people (adults and kids alike) went out over the weekend, and I hope it was hip hop and happening, with lots of sweets to nibble and nosh on. However boring and cheap me didn't go out to any bar parties or anything last Saturday night, but don't worry I got tricks up my sleeve for Thursday! My best friend and I are dressing up together, with her going as Fran Fyne from The Nanny (TV show), and me going as Val (Fran's best friend). We went all out, wigs and vintage clothes, and a skit being prepared in character to greet the trick or treaters. After all the afternoon goodies are given out, we plan to go to dinner in character, and make people laugh there socks off. Pictures will be posted, don't you worry.
Plans, Planning, and being Planned. All things on my to do list, how about yours? Happy Halloween, and as always, Peace.
Yup those were the three most popular tags on twitter at least at one point this morning. And for the first time there was not a "tell your (insert politician here) to tell the supreme court to rule on....."
That to me was so exciting. I now know that in my lifetime I will be able to get married. I now know that I am valued to the country I live in.
Now I know these decisions will not have that many immediate effects. What it does is say that any state that has approved or will approve same sex marriages can't take it back, ever. And yes DOMA is officially dead. We have the desicion around PROP 8 to thank for this, and in a weird way we must thank prop 8 itself. If prop 8 had never happened, (as horrible as it was), the constitutional debate over same sex marriage would have never entered the legal arena to the scale that it did. However, in today's decision, there is nothing given down that says that the fed govt or the states that don't have SS marriages, have to have them. There is not going to be a law (yet) that forces them too. I feel that the video below definitely explains it right in saying that it sets a moral standard for the entire country that are marriages should be allowed and recognized, but does not technically force any legal change in states that don't have it.
That leads me to the other decision. People in states that do not have ss marriages are going to continue the fight to have there state laws change, and although the moral example the supreme court has set will help their cases, that alone sadly will not win them. However what I believe will help them win the cases is the Tax Desicion. In the next one or two year, or however much time is legally needed to change it, same sex couples who are married in states that allow their marriages will now be allowed to file joint tax returns and receive all equal federal benefits as a hetero couple. In short, the federal govt has to recognize all same sex marriages. The question lies is it fair/constitutional to deny those tax benefits to couples (although unmarried) in other states? (obviously I believe its wrong, but I alone am not going to change the governor of Mississippi's mind).
So that my shpeal/opinion/explanation. I am happy. I am ecstatic. But there is of course still more work to be done. However I believe it will get done a lot faster than previously anticipated because of these decisions. So enjoy NBC's analysis that I have found I believe does it justice and explains it in a way that is understandable. Peace -Sam
Hello Lovelies! Not that this reaches much of an audience, but I'm still going to talk about what I want to talk about, and that is OUTSpoken, an event about mental health and the LGBTQ community. But before I get to my awkward promo, I want to take a moment to tell you why this is especially so important to me.
1. I'm queer, we aaaaaalllll know that. (<3 all, but esp women)
2. I deal with mental health issues and have been surrounded by others who deal with mental health issues almost my entire life. I have OCD (heavy on the anxiety) and a probable case of Bipolar disorder (if you don't know, I was diagnosed when I was 10) where after 12 years I still have days where I don't believe it, and other days where I'm like "oh yeah, definitely bipolar" (or some variation).
These two things are only a part of my life, they don't define my entire self. However whats important to know is that I saw these as two completely separate until well into my sophomore year of college. Whether I like it or not, in small ways one effects the other and vise versa, and it makes my situation even more unique. for instance:
My psychiatrist is a 75 year old, very old school kind of guy. Not someone I especially like opening up to. He is nice and all, I got stuck with him after my last hospitalization a few years back, and he listens to what I say if I need a dosage change in my meds, which is a major PLUS. Would it be helpful if he knew about my my personal life more? Maybe! I don't know because I've never had the chance to figure that one out. (obviously I know it would be more important for say a therapist to know, of which currently I am not seeing anyone because my insurance SUCKS. with a capitol S. and I'm brooooooookkkkeee).
And that is just one reason why mental health among the LGBTQ population needs to be talked about more, so that mental health professionals can be informed and educated, and there can be more options for us, and we can be comfortable talking to any professional.
On a slightly different note YOUR STORY can help change someones life. When I entered college, I very quickly had a great support system for the gay/queer part of my life. But with the mental health stuff, I felt trapped, like I could talk to no one, except the counselor at counseling services who I saw religiously every week my freshmen year. Even though eventually I found some people I could talk to, I still felt separated from my pride friends because I couldn't tell them, even though I knew they would probably super understanding. All it took was for one girl from pride to share her struggle with depression with m, after she sensed that something was off with me ( I was having a bad week at the time). Seriously just one person saying I know what your going through, I went through something similar is so important and life changing.
After that, I decided that enough was enough, and I wasn't going to hide anything anymore. I wasn't going to compartmentalize my life anymore, which is what many people who face the double stigma do.
So mental health issues need to be talked about. GLBTQ rights need to be talked about. They also need to be talked about together. So come to OUTSpoken; a call for LGBTQ voices, and come share your story!
OUTSpoken
Performance and Workshop
Monday 6/24 6pm, Center on Halsted, (Theater, 3rd floor)
Free or pay what you can, register here (or just come)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=VXkhzhmhUzk
Facebook event here https://www.facebook.com/events/390523301053780/?fref=ts
Sponsored by Erasing the Distance, watch the video to learn what ETD does:
