On Second Thought...

I should probably tell you all about this play I saw yesterday cause it really was just that good. It was a pay-what-you-can night at the Steppenwolf and that means A broke girl like me can afford to go see a pretty cool show. It was also a show put on by Steppenwolf for young adults, so most of the actors high school students and such which I love to see since I have a high interest ion young adults and children's theater. It was insanely good quality acting! Ok ok ok on to my real pointful response.

FML: How Carson McCullers Saved My Life. Yes that is what it's called. It poised as the story of this girl Jo, a gay high school student in a catholic school, as told through her graphic novel, but really its the story of all 5 characters in the play and how everyone is affected by the situation that is occurring. There's Jo, then there's her brother Reed, who doesn't think anything of her being gay, there's Jo's best guy friend, whose also presumed gay, Mickey, there's Emma, Jo's new chem partner turned only "straight" girl in school who would want to be friends with Jo, and last there's Ms. D, the new English teacher, also presumed gay.

In an interesting plot, none of the enemies or negative characters were portrayed on stage. It gave the play way more focus on what was actually occurring, and made us imagine that these "bad guys" could be anyone in the real world. I think the three young students in this show portray 3 different levels of dealing with gay in a straight world. Mickey, Always wants to fight, do do what's right by taking action, convincing others that they should say something. Jo is in the middle, Just dealing with the teasing and Harassment and she doesn't want to make a fuss so she doesn't draw more attention to herself, but still stands out and is not going to blend in. Then there's Emma, who is struggling with why she maybe likes Jo, and is caught between her abusive boyfriend Tyler and Jo, struggling with learning about what being gay really means for Jo and others and trying to be the best friend that she knows how to be to Jo.

Ok enough with the character development, the play's plot is simple enough, but at times not cliche and at others very cliche. Jo, is struggling but it gets worse as the story goes on. Little bings of light happen along the way, when she confides in her very understanding teacher, Mrs D. when the school changes the rule where girls were required to where skirts, but there is still a gradual decline. First its someone defacing Jo's locker with the word "Faggot" and then the climax, is Jo getting beaten up close to death after a school basketball game and lands her in the hospital for a week. It is a sad, shocking, and unexpected climax, that jolts you right in the middle of this story. I also thought the ending was a little short, but an amazing choice. No happy ending, no resolution. Ms. D, the only teacher Jo likes at her catholic school, gets fired. Even though Emma repairs her friendship with Jo, Jo does not seem to "get better" (although she heals from the beating and returns to school). The piece ends with just Jo and Mickey, ditching school and having a conversation.

I could have gone on to explain that story forever and in such detail of all the little things that happened. I loved the show more than you can ever know. It was not a PSA, It didn't come off as anything predictable or what I may have expected. It was reality, raw, real, and true, but still portrayed in a semi fictional way. The emotions, the feelings, even the behaviors from all sides are things that go on in our world every single day. A world where kids are not safe from each other is the sad world that we live in and I like to think that I fight to change that every single day. I don't dislike someone for not having the same views as I do, but as long as you can show me respect, I will give you that in return. I've lived with a catholic roommate, I have another friend who does not believe in gay rights. Neither of them have ever pushed there views on me and I don't push on them, and we have great friendships because of it, and I have learned so much from both of them. The problem that I have is with parents, adults, and other people who don't let children think independently, don't let them form their own views. or don't teach them to respect others even if they have different views than you. That last piece is what is really going to save our kids and save our future. Plays like this are so important for people to see because they truly make you think and help you understand from all perspectives. Peace.

Sunday Morning

I don't feel like doing homework at all. I have some internship things and personal chores to do but I will get those done tonight. Only one homework assignment and I have Monday night to do that. I don;t know if any of the decisions I make are good ones anymore. I question everything on whether it's a rational one and I can't seem to come to conclusions about a lot of things. Even something simple and chilling with an old friend today because I have nothing else I really want to do. but also because I need some socializing due to many reasons. At least the weather has been insanely nice and it's been helping improve my mood a bit, which hasn't been great. It's also letting enjoy the city that much more and learning to love it even more than I did which I thought was impossible. I mean I even got sunburned yesterday. Unheard of for March in Chicago. Today just seems to be a lazy Sunday morning, which is always well needed. Next up will be some cool pics to share so stay tuned. Peace.

You need to show your work. Those are the words that I dreaded when I was a kid. Please write down all the steps. I need to see that you know the process. I hated writing down the steps and I hated explaining my process. Why? because I couldn't.

I can't explain what's in my head or how my head works. When I see a math problem I can solve it entirely in my head in a series of steps that make no logical sense to anyone but me and others who think like I do. Seriously, read some research, a lot of bipolar kids think this way. And no offense, I solved it faster than the teacher every time. The "right" or "correct" or in their eyes "only" way they would teach us to do math in school seemed so inefficient and after learning the basic steps in the first 10 minutes I would automatically start connecting the shortcuts to solving the problem. Doing all the steps and showing how you got to each number was so frustrating to me and it takes me ten times longer to process the steps than it does to actually solve the problem. And yes I would get the same right answer as everyone else, I just solved it differently.

Now since giving up math at the physics level in High School, I haven't had to deal with this much except for a short semester stint in a college math class, not really by choice. And I probably would not have stuck it out in High School as long as I did if it weren't for an awesome math teacher who let my brain do as it pleased. Plus I had gotten a lot better at dealing with this as a teenager than I did when I was younger. I could explain parts of things, just enough to keep the teachers satisfied.

So I'm not going to say that's exactly what I had to deal with today, but I think its a good metaphor. For some reason my emotions got a little out of wack and my frustration level became a little to high for my liking before I had the chance to stop it from rearing its ugly head. My argument was dead from the get go, mainly because I was trying to defend a process in which I can't verbally explain. This lead to an awkward situation that I am not happy about.

That's all I really have to say at this point since my brain is still processing it. Advice always welcome. Peace.

Making Full Circles

So just now, I realized something pretty amazing that I learned from my internship, that connects right back to my art seminar class.

Just yesterday, we went to visit the Art Institute of Chicago, a very beautiful museum and definitely a treat. We specifically went to see a new show in the new modern wing of the museum. It's called LightYears (http://www.artic.edu/aic/collections/exhibitions/LightYears/index) and It was almost all photography, so I loved it! If you are in Chicago and like art even in the slightest, go check out this museum.

On to today. Today, I was working, I've been researching grants and possible funding sources for my internship all day. I come across a tricky organization and I found out what they have previously funded and right in the middle of all these normal 5 and 10 thousand dollar grants, there is this larger one to the art institute. It didn't shock me to much since it was a museum, it was only later that I made the connection. There was not much more on this foundation, but there was plenty on the guy who created the foundation, so out of curiosity I click on a link for him. Turns out, him and his foundation were one of the main sponsors of the Art Institute's modern wing! Pretty cool huh?

Not only did I get to see and discuss some very cool art yesterday, I got to spend part of my day today learning about one of the dudes that made it possible for me to see that art! I know I'm a dork sometimes but seriously this is how you learn! I love how this program comes full circle. Peace.

If I meet one more alumni I swear I'll...

...Love my school more than ever! No seriously, maybe it's because I live in the midwest, maybe it's because a lot of Alumni end up in Chicago, but I swear Everytime I talk to anyone and tell them what school I go to, they know someone who went there. If it wasn't themselves that went their, it's always their sister's ex boyfriend, their Aunt, their best friend's cousin, I could go on.

So today I have a short story that may not have all that much to do with Chicago, except if it weren't for the ACM program, I would not have met this person. Additionally, my spirits turned themselves around a bit yesterday, and I've had good motivation both yesterday and today, which is giving me the energy to write this. I'm glad, because I was very sullen last week.

Apologies, to the point. So today, I met Heather. She is one of the program associate's for ACM, and manages a bunch of the study abroad programs. I was at the ACM office today (The one on Wacker Dr, not the Chicago program office) and I thought it was cool when I found out she was an Alum, but I think she was more intrigued than I was, as she came up to me and started asking about my majors! It was so nice to be able to talk to someone who knows Lake Forest, the campus, certain inside references, ect. And I think she liked hearing about things that were currently going on. I mean, unless Alumni are visiting my campus for the purpose of talking to students, I never really know what to say to an alum in an offbeat setting, because sometimes they are just not interested. I was super glad she initiated the conversation, and I think I ended up taking up half her lunch break with all my babbling! Let's just say we talked for a while. She gave me some good advice, made me feel connected, and gave me hope for still being connected to my school, even after I graduate.

It's the little encounters like these, where I had planned to be home by a little after 12 but didn't end up leaving the ACM office til 12:45, that just make my days worth while. It boosted my mood, and again it was another opportunity taken in the spur of the moment and so worth it. Maybe I will start connecting with more Alumni. Peace.